Well, after my last view vacation posts, I suppose I should try to return this bloggy to journalistic greatness. That means informing you of things that you may not know. Here are some fun facts:
Men are gaining on women in life expectancy. Women can still expect four more years than men, but over the last two decades, men have increased their life expectancy at twice the rate of women. Reasons: 1) Women are working and getting more stress from it. 2) Women took up smoking about 25 years ago and are now dying from it. Sorry about your luck ladies, equality sucks, don't it?
Still, the one very important thing that the study neglects to mention is that the reason most men die earlier is because they spend their entire lives dealing with women. They should study lesbians, bet they die the same age as men. Prolly gonna get some feedback on that one.
Teenage substance abuse is shifting from illegal to legal drugs. Among 8th graders, marijuana use has fallen to 12 percent, but abuse of barbituates, sedatives and tranquilizers has risen to 7 percent. New favorites of Jimmy and Susy are painkillers such as Oxycontin and sleeping pills such as Ambien. Huh? What happened to good 'ol beer? I guess now doing the pot ain't all that bad?
And last, our 'lil entrepeneur of the year award goes to Freddie who figured out supply and demand. Albeit he is marketing his body, which is also a creep factor of 10.
Webcams have opened a new era in child pornography. 1) Webcams are now cheap enough for kids to afford. 2) Broadband is fast enough to deliver sexual video. 3) A kid who posts innocuous video of himself is tracked down by pedophiles, who befriend him and offer money for favors, starting with partial nudity via the Webcam. 4) Some kids turn this into a business. 5) Parents don't know, because the Webcam is in the kid's room. 6) Cops can no longer pose as kids to catch pedophiles, because pedophiles insist that the kid show himself on a Webcam
Wow! The female commentary was BOLD. Have to respect that kind of fearless journalism.
RjD2 at the Metro on 2/24. Any of the Chicago troup interested in that show?
The lesbian comment brings up a whole other thing
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Yes...Bold but true to some extent. In a Darwinian sense, you could conjure blaming male life expectancy on women. Fact: males are pressured by females. Since female species generally make a greater parental investment, they tend to be more discriminating in mate choice, so the reproductive success of males depends largely on their ability to compete for mating opportunities either by winning fights with other males or by presenting displays preferred by females. So blaming it on
I forgot that you like equations. In summary:
Increased male life expectancy = f (x)
x = decrease in societal stressors(females earning $ and keeping busy) + decreased environmental stressors + increased
my life expectancy just dropped 2 years trying to figure all of this out...i'd ask for those 2 years back, but as a the infamous Hans Moleman says, "never mind, i would have just wasted them anyway."
Ha. My head hurts too Dale. But, that is because we are trying to understand a woman aka Jules. Burn.
I know--it's kind of deep, and the truth is painful. I didn't mean to hurt you with my analysis, guys. I'm sure it's scarey knowing that being male is now the single largest demographic risk factor for early mortality in developed countries. As Lloyd Christmas would say, "don't you go dyin' on me".
Dale- maybe you should think twice about taking advice from Hans, an unlucky, single 31-year old (but looks 75) cult leader who drives a Gremlin.
Mr. Sadens, please forgive the late reply. I will probably be ass out for the RJD2 show, but we do need to get together real soon like.